Jason & Tyrel
Get to know Tyrel:
If I was to sum up my younger years it would be plucked directly from my weekly progress reports sent home from my 6th grade teacher, “a bit chatty at times.” The trajectory of my life was shaped by my dad’s written response after a few months of that repeated report. His reply, “if being chatty is the worst thing about him I think he’s doing fine.”
Developing a queer identity in a rural, blue-collar town was no easy feat and I fought tooth and nail to make it happen. I was raised on a cattle ranch at the end of the Steeples mountains in Bull River. My childhood was filled with an appreciation of the outdoors, hard work, animal husbandry, and the importance of a tight-nit family. However, my religious upbringing would lead through some deep and lonesome downs underneath those positive memories.
It took me ten years from the time I first discussed my sexuality with my parents to when I would eventually come out publicly as a gay man. Ten arduous years that were filled with shame, self-loathing, and intermittent forms of reparative therapy. If you connect with me thus far my advice to you is hang on and be patient. My current life was one I never had the ability to even dream of growing up. In my mind the only options for my future were to live a celibate life of solitude, lie to myself daily and marry a woman, or to die. The idea of marrying the greatest man I have ever met on the top of Baker Mountain with our supportive loved ones around us wasn’t even a dream as I never allowed that dream to even cross my mind.
And here we are. Me in this photo, attempting to give you a small glimpse into the life of gay man in a rural community, and you, hopefully gaining an appreciation for the resiliency of determined, queer voices. I currently work as an educator/mentor in the ICU at the East Kootenay Regional Hospital, focusing on being a positive support system for those who are new to the area of critical care nursing. I have taught at the College of the Rockies, taught spin classes at The Studio, played piano for countless rehearsals and shows for the Mount Baker Theater program, MC’d multiple fundraisers, and performed multiple times at various venues around the Kootenays. My upbringing provided me with a level of resiliency that ensured I not alone persevered, but I thrived, even if I am still “a bit chatty at times.”
So, keep your head up and pay no mind to those who are undeserving of your time, light, and energy. My philosophy has now become if being gay is the worst thing about me, I think I’m doing just fine.
Get to know Jason:
How many years do you need to live in the Kootenays to be finally counted as a Kootenay boy? It’s been well over fifteen years since moving to Cranbrook from the prairies and I don’t know if you’ll find many who love the Kootenays more than I do. This area has allowed me to pursue endless outdoor adventures and to run my own small, successful business. I’m not sure if moving away from my home province is what allowed me to explore my own gay identity, but I definitely think it helped. To be honest I didn’t give it much thought growing up, always pushing away the concept in an attempt to avoid confrontation with myself.
Running and biking in the Community Forest alongside my furry companions is what gave me peace and continues to do so today. The outdoors doesn’t have the societal expectations that exist inside towns and cities. You just get to be you, and that’s when I love myself the most.
Coming out was difficult as I don’t fit a lot of the stereotypes associated with gay men. That’s been something that has always been a bit of a challenge for me. The constant attempt of society putting everything and everyone into a box. My pride is less of an “in your face” attempt to share my ideologies but to simply be a good person that also happens to be gay. This approach has allowed for deep connection with people simply due to my existence as a person and not because of, or in spite of being gay.
I have been able to fundraise tens of thousands of dollars over the years to various local organizations through Sidekick’s Annual Anti-Bullying Day Pink T-Shirt Campaign, including local GSA groups in our middle and high schools. This isn’t meant as a humble brag, but more so encouragement that you can make change in whatever capacity you’re able to do so.